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   Hello again! It's been a while, but I'm back with another writer's guide. As always, I should remind you that I'm not a professional and everything here is just my own thoughts and opinions. Please keep that in mind!

    As with normal life, stories often have romantic relationships. Sometimes the characters are together before the story even begins, and sometimes the characters get together throughout the course of the story. Either way, here are some tips and notes on your character's relationships!


Creating Relationships


The Evil Girlfriend-That-Must-Go

    Scenario: Mary really wants to go out with Jon, but Jon's evil girlfriend Elizabeth is in the way.

    It's really easy to write about how evil Elizabeth is, especially if you're writing from Mary's point of view. Of course she's evil! She's in the way to Mary's happy relationship. Right? Well, try to remember that you don't have to make your readers hate Elizabeth for them to want her to go. If you're writing from Mary's point of view, it's going to be biased because Mary is going to notice every single flaw in Elizabeth's character and point them out to make her seem like the bad guy. While sometimes this is the case, not every girlfriend-in-the-way is truly a bad person. Maybe Elizabeth is really nice and Jon's just more interested in Mary. 

Old Characters, New Couple

    Sometimes when your old characters get together, it's easy to change the character a lot and not even notice. While it's true that some people change entirely when they start dating somebody, this isn't always the case. I see a lot of stories where a couple starts dating and one of the characters becomes a completely different person. I don't mean things like dressing up more often or being more aware of their personal hygiene. I'm talking more along the lines of the strong willed and outspoken character that becomes meek and passive and does whatever his significant other says. If your readers are already familiar with what kind of person your character is, try to stay true to that through the relationship. If one of the characters is supposed to change drastically for the sake of the story, that's totally fine! Just make sure it's what you intended.


Maintaining Relationships


Only Me! Nobody Else Ever!!!

   I'll try to be civil but this subject makes me want to tear my hair out. Just because two people start dating does not mean that they need to cut off all connections with people other than their significant other. Look at it this way: If my fiance said I wasn't allowed to hang out with guys because we're together, that would eliminate half of my friends. But by that logic, since I'm bisexual that means that I wouldn't be able to hang out with any girls either. That means I just cut off all contact to every friend I have. That is unhealthy and f*cking stupid. 

    Most common scenario that I see in writing: Max and Steve just started dating. Steve says hi to his male friend of 6 years. Max gives him the silent treatment all day and then pins him against a wall when they get home. He declares that Steve belongs to him and needs to cut off all contact with friend. Steve thinks this is romantic. First, the friend of six years shouldn't be a threat. They've had six years to start dating and they haven't. Steve obviously chose Max over friend. Second, if Max already has that much trouble trusting Steve, their relationship is probably already doomed. Third, that's not romantic, it's controlling, possessive, and unhealthy.

    TL;DR: Jealousy is not attractive. It's also not required in a relationship. If you can't trust your significant other to coexist with other people and not cheat on you, you shouldn't be in a relationship with them. This applies to writing and real life. Grr.

So We're Together... Now What?

    A lot of writers seem to be under the impression that the next step after hooking up their characters is to initiate fights. All couples fight, right? Actually, no. Despite popular belief, there exists such a thing as a healthy and happy relationship devoid of screaming matches. How would I know? I'm in one. My fiance and I have been together for five years and counting and not once have we even raised our voices at each other. If we disagree on something I will tell him how I feel about it, he'll tell me how he feels about it, we will discuss it until we find a compromise and, if we can't, we simply agree to disagree and move on.

    I'm certainly not saying that your characters can't argue. Sometimes it's just in a person's nature to be argumentative. I simply want to mention that it doesn't have to be the only thing that goes on in their relationship. So rather than putting your characters together and filling their days with arguments and make up sex, try giving them trials to overcome as a team, like financial troubles or perhaps an apocalypse. Send them on a date to see a movie or to hang out with some friends. Happy relationships aren't boring, I promise!

Boys and Boys and Girls and Girls

    Short and simple. Two men can be in a relationship without one of them being extremely feminine. Two women can be in a relationship without one of them being extremely masculine. It's always a possibility, but certainly not a requirement. It doesn't have to be top/bottom, uke/seme. One of them doesn't have to be "the girl" or "the guy" in the relationship. If that's how it is, that's fine. But it doesn't have to be that way. Everyone is different!

--

That's all for now!

    This guide will be considered a work in progress. Things may be added to it as they come up! Please feel free to share your thoughts on this subject in the comments. I'd love to hear what you have to say! 
Finally, another writing guide!

First, I want to say thank you to all of the people who enjoyed my other guides. They've received so many faves and comments over time and it's really exciting! I went on a bit of a hiatus for a while, so thanks for sticking around and waiting for me to get back!

Second, I'd like to mention to all watchers new and old that while they are fun, writer's guides are not the focus of this account. I will be uploading other things such as art and photography and my own writing. Please keep that in mind when watching me- I don't want you to be disappointed! 

Third, I'd like to apologize again for the angry jealousy rant. It's a touchy subject for me because I have a friend that firmly believes that you shouldn't hang out with anyone when you're in a relationship. I watched her go from a very happy person with a lot of great friends to a very lonely and negative person over the course of her relationship, which is even more sad because she doesn't see how it's affecting her. I also lost one of my best friends entirely because of this way of thinking. 

And that's all! If you'd like to check out my other writing guides or maybe even some of my writing, take a peek in my gallery! Here are some of my favorites:

Writing Lesson: Naming Your Character    Your character's name is one of the most important decisions you have to make when writing a story. There are tons of resources for naming your characters (baby name websites being my personal favorite) but there are also many things you should take into consideration. Here are some do's and don'ts in no particular order. 
Similar names for twins  I read an article on names recently that expressly forbid the use of matching or similar twin names because it was "overdone". While yes, naming your twins Jayden and Kayden can be a bit tacky sounding, the truth is that people do it. A lot. I've personally met a pair of identical twins named Kirsten and Kristen. Do I think their parents are crazy? A little, but when you're choosing names for your twins, it's hard not to look for rhyming or alliteration. For writers, my only suggestion is to make them visually different enough that readers can tell them apart. Jace and Jackson are easy tw
  Writing Lesson: Your Character's Parents    While I am not a professional by any means, I have been writing for many years and, more recently, beta-reading as well. In all of my experience, I've noticed that a lot of to-be authors follow the easy trends and miss out on some great story telling opportunities. Hopefully this guide will help you improve your story and learn that the easy way out isn't always the best! If you would like more writing guides and tutorials, check out the description below.
    For this "Quick Tips" entry, I'm going to focus on an important part of back story: parents.
    *Please note! I understand that, unfortunately, not everyone reading this has parents. If your parents have passed away or are otherwise absent, please forgive anything written here that might be considered upsetting. These scenarios are for fictional parents only and when I say "dead", I do not mean it to sound nearly as insensitive as it
  Arlyn of the Ocean                My childhood summers were filled with the salty air and sea shells of the Gulf, my favorite place to relax and play. I vividly remember the cold ocean water splashing at my ankles and the taste of the popsicles we ate between bouts of play. I collected hundreds of sea shells and made magnificent sand castles, dug holes as deep as I was tall and even caught a few fish. What I remember most of all, though, was Arlyn.
                The first summer I spent with my aunt was an entirely new experience; I had never seen the beach or played in salt water before. She coaxed me gently toward the water, armed with an array of floaties and toys. I followed her cautiously, reassured by her claims that I wasn’t meaty enough to interest any of the ocean’s monsters. I figured she had to be right; I weighed next to nothing as a scrawny, awkward ten-yea
  Stray       I'd say it was love at first sight, but it was that kind of love of which none would ever approve. I was beautiful and classy; he was dirty and probably smelly. I first saw him wandering down the street without much care in the world. He seemed content to just pad down the sidewalk, enjoying the warm summer sun. So maybe he wasn't exactly my type, (he looked like he hadn't bathed in a few days and I was all about the hygiene) but something about the proud way he carried himself took firm hold of my attention. He just seemed so independent, something I had never experienced.
       It was two nights later when I saw him again. It was dark and there wasn't a soul on the street save for him and his equally dark shadow. I know I shouldn't break rules, but I couldn't help but sneak out. I hadn't been out this late since I was young, back when I didn't understand the sleep patterns of the two-leggers and thought the
  TogetherI've never been a drinker,
so I took the pills with tea.
I crawled into his coffin,
Quiet as can be.
He's cold and stiff and smelly,
Not the same I knew,
But when the pills kick in,
I'll be cold and smelly too.
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:icontessaturtle:
TessaTurtle Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2014   Writer
And this just improved my writing by 128%
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:iconkitsunechann:
Kitsunechann Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:D
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:iconluluthedragonqueen:
LuluTheDragonQueen Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer

Alright, so allow me to present you with the following scenario,

 

She spends the entire first quarter of the story hating him with a bitter passion (much like the whole world except me hates Joffrey Lanister). She gets captured and imprisoned in his castle by some of his soldiers and he's unaware of her presence in the fortress for several hours.

 

He manages to pull some strings and manipulate the guards to release her from the dungeon. He persuades them to let her take up quarters in the southern tower, near where his sleeping quarters are located, but she's far too enraged to realize that he's doing it to keep her safe (out of the overly aggressive and inquisitive hands of his subordinates).

 

His job now is to prove to her, over a period of time, that he's not the evil, monstrous tyrant that the local propaganda claims he is.

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:iconkitsunechann:
Kitsunechann Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Stockholm Syndrome! That sounds pretty interesting :D So long as he didn't wink at her once and she falls head over heels for him, that could make a very good story :3
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:iconluluthedragonqueen:
LuluTheDragonQueen Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer

Don't worry, that's not gonna happen.^_^ It's gonna take a lot more than just one wink. Maybe three… JK, I want it to be an ongoing process that will take patience. I want him to have to make sacrifices in order to win her over. It's actually kind of complex, really. Because of his looks, every girl who meets him struggles to see past what's on the outside. But her hatred is so intense that his charm doesn't even phase her most of the time. The interesting thing is that she's the first and only girl he's ever had any feelings for beyond just physical attraction. So he's willing to do pretty much anything for her.

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:iconkitsunechann:
Kitsunechann Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Also, given this scenario to think about, I highly recommend a book called Unwind by Neal Shusterman and its sequels Unholy and Unsouled. Not only is the series hands down one of the best I've ever read (and I've read so many books in my life it's disgusting), but there is a similar scenario in the second and third books in which one of the characters is kidnapped by a person they consider to be an abomination but they slowly begin to realize that there's much more than they originally thought. Super vague because I don't want to give anything away, but you should really read that. The first book is one of those books that you read cover to cover, set it down, and completely rethink everything you know. It's extraordinary.
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:iconluluthedragonqueen:
LuluTheDragonQueen Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
I'd love to check those out! :) They sound really amazing. *Adds to list so she doesn't forget*
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:iconkitsunechann:
Kitsunechann Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:D That sounds awesome!
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:icon1deathgod:
1deathgod Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Well done, as usual.:D  The only advice I have is that you keep in mind the term "relationship" encompasses more than romance.  It's everything from friends to family to enemies.  Maybe I'm just too literal, but I came into this expecting more than just the romantic variety.:shrug:
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:iconkitsunechann:
Kitsunechann Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I did consider that but I wasn't quite sure how to word it differently ^^; Any ideas? :3 Thank you!
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